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Cutting down a trunky beast (commonly referred to as a “tree”) is most definately not as easy as it looks. Being at the top of a ladder, tied to it with the thinnest piece of cotton man can create is no way to spend a weekend. You’re getting through it, working hard…and then you hear it, that wonderful sound…that re-assuring creak that tell’s you this isn’t a huge waste of your time and you are getting through this bastard trunk from hell.

 CRACK, “mooooove”…”fuucking RUN” as everybody scrambles to get out of the way of the falling fool. The job is done. The only thing left to do is hack it to bits, kick it a little and put it in a pile. This is nowhere near as interesting as the first part…as there is no creak, no crack, no noises that can easily bring a huge smile to your face. The tree is dead, and i need a shower.